Pluto
Phew, it’s been a while. Life’s been a wee bit wild, but things have finally settled down. So, now that I have survived this transition into a new phase of my life, I am free to continue posting as I originally intended.
In other news, scientists have recently recently released a shocking “discovery.” The planet we love and cherish, the planet that shares it’s name with the beloved canine sidekick of Mickey Mouse, the planet that also shares its name with the Roman god OF THE UNDERWORLD, is not actually a planet at all. That’s right: Pluto is no longer deemed “worthy” of planethood. This is where global research funding is going.
The next logical step is a rapid recall of kindergarten textboooks across the nation, in order to swiftly correct this horrendous error of modern thought. Brainwashing techniques and colorful videos on “Sesame Street” will follow, spreading this data to the common public. Astrologists will not survive the transition.
So, Pluto is now a “Dwarf Planet.” Apparently, the far reaching influence of political correctness has not yet informed the IAU (International Astronomical Union) that stellar bodies prefer the term “gargantuan-challenged.” However, there is one special side-effect to this new definition. Instead of the nine happy planets we knew and loved before, there are now twelve planets. This is obviously an improvement–I mean, where would we be without UB313? The circle would not be complete. There must be something good about having twelve planets. Maybe now we can rename the planets after the twelve disciples. The greek god thing was getting kind of old, anyway.
–Denel–
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For more information, check out:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2006_redefinition_of_planet
http://www.space.com/scienceastronomy/060816_planet_definition.html
http://www.cnn.com/2006/TECH/space/08/16/new.planets.ap/index.html